Wife wants either me to leave or she will and take children

[Tiredfighter]

I've searched the forums but haven't found quite what I am looking for so here goes:
No extramarital affairs (that I know of).
Two boys 17 and 14.
Married 20+ years.
I've always been there for family and I am the high-earner. We both work. Wife works at home.
Wife is "sick of me" - the list is endless of all the things I do wrong in her eyes.
She is saying one of us has to go and if she goes she will take the kids.
I could go into more detail about how lousy our marriage has been and has gotten worse, but the real legal issue is can she really take the kids out of our home because of her sense of how terrible I am?
Can she really force me out?

[Ryan Short]

It will be hard for her to force you out, but she could move out and take the kids with her if they're willing to go. In the absence of a court order you both have equal access to the children.