Is your attorney someone that you trust? Does your lawyer stand by your side and guide you along the way?
Am I getting the most out of my attorney? Transcript
Hi, I’m Lee Rosen. Am I getting the most out of my attorney? This is a
difficult process. It takes a lot of time. You’ve hired an attorney to
guide you through it, to help you navigate all of the twists and turns, and
to work your way through to the end of your relationship.
There will be ups and downs in your relationship with your attorney. Things
are going to happen. You’re going to get upset. That’s normal. It’s to be
I will tell you that frustrations that take place at home or through
interactions with your spouse sometimes get played out in the office with
your attorney. You may get angry. You may get upset. There may be difficult
Your lawyer is ready for that. We are prepared. We understand. That’s part
of the process. It’s not something that’s unique to you. It’s something we
deal with all of the time. We’ll handle it. But, you need to be sure that,
in interacting with your attorney, you’re getting the most impact out of
that relationship. That’s why I’ve got these tips for you today.
The most important tip is to trust your attorney. You picked this attorney
because you did your research, you evaluated options, and you decided this
is the expert that you want to have on your side.
It’s difficult to trust people. It’s especially difficult to trust people
when you’re coming out of a relationship where things didn’t go as you
planned, and in one way or another the things you counted on and trusted
didn’t turn out the way you expected. But you need to trust the lawyer.
And, the lawyer may ask you to do things that feel uncomfortable, may ask
you not to pursue issues that you want to pursue, or may guide you in a
direction that isn’t necessarily the thing you’re most comfortable with.
It’s hard to predict what’s coming, but it’s easy to predict that there are
going to be some challenging issues to work through.
You picked the lawyer because of trust. Now, you’ve got to trust their
advice. There’s no reason to have the lawyer if you’re not going to trust
the lawyer’s advice. Listen and do what they’re asking you to do.
Now, I’m not suggesting that you do it blindly. If you really begin to
believe that this isn’t the relationship for you, then go and get a second
opinion. You can go to any lawyer, present the facts and circumstances, and
ask for their advice.
Second opinions are permitted in North Carolina. Lawyers are allowed to do
that. If you’re worried about the first lawyer’s advice, get the second
opinion. But, hey, once you find out that the lawyer’s telling you to do
the right stuff, then go ahead and trust them and do it. That’s why you
hired the lawyer in the first place.
One final tip for you, something really important: don’t rely on the advice
of friends and family about your legal issues. That’s why you have a
lawyer. Trust the lawyer.
We so often have people that come in, clients that come in, and they say,
“Well, you know, I don’t want to do that because my sister’s cousin’s
husband got custody of the children just because his wife committed
adultery.” Or, “Oh, she got the house because he didn’t pay child support.”
These are just not the way things work. We deal with this every day. We
know the law. We know the system.
Your friends and your families are just telling you stories they’ve heard,
and I will tell you usually they haven’t heard the whole story. They didn’t
get all the facts. When people are telling these stories they usually leave
out the embarrassing details.
You’ve hired a lawyer. You want to maximize your use of that lawyer. Trust
their advice. Rely on what they’re telling you. That’s why you got the
lawyer in the first place. Don’t put the friend’s advice or the family
member’s advice over the lawyer’s advice. You’ve got an expert. Use the