Going through a separation and divorce is tough. Plenty has been spoken and written about the emotional and financial costs. However, there is another consequence of divorce that can catch those going through it off guard – grappling with a schedule and calendar.
Many folks fall into a rhythm, work Monday – Friday and free time on the weekends. However, when a couple separates, especially those with children, a new schedule is mandated. Certain dates and events need to be documented, a new habit that might be a bit challenging for some.
Important Divorce-Related Dates for Parents
To make the transition easier for children of a couple who has separated or divorced, experts suggest that both parents keep a calendar prominently displayed in each parent’s home. Color coded dates will help everyone be assured of upcoming events and visitations. School holidays, breaks and trips should be recorded, along with doctor appointments, extracurricular activities, and the like. Child therapists suggest that this calendaring helps reassure children of stability. Keeping a detailed calendar might be a challenge if one parent has always relied on the other to keep the schedule.
Along with the old fashioned paper calendar, it also recommended that both parents rely on an electronic calendar or family schedule type app. There are some free apps, and some that are more complex that allow for messaging, photo sharing, expense tracking, etc. (These apps can often be the preferred method of communication between parties.)
Divorced parents need to be able to plan and schedule work trips, vacations, and visitations. This can be a new practice for some, as previously stated, some parents headed into divorce really can be a little unaware of family activities and schedules. Parents also need to establish dates for celebrating birthdays, holidays, and other events.
Other Divorce Dates to Be Aware Of
There are other dates that factor prominently in a divorce, as well. Court documents will require, at a minimum, the following: the date of marriage; the date of separation; and the children’s dates of birth.
Parties need to be exact with these dates. Court documents need to tell the story of the involved couple and family. The court will require the date and place of marriage. (You must allege you were married so that a judge can grant a divorce.) Most states require one year of separation before you can file for divorce. The date of separation has to be stated with specificity. We can’t just say that a couple separated May, 2021 – the actual day is necessary as well.
Dates and calendaring are also involved in the divorce process beyond child custody. The legal process has mandatory dates and deadlines that must be followed. For example, if a person files for divorce or child support, a lawsuit is filed. The other party, the person being sued, has 30 days to respond to the lawsuit. If that person does not respond, then the other party can schedule a court date, giving the other party 10 days notice, and attend court on the scheduled date and ask the court to grant the relief sought – a divorce or a set amount of child support.
If there is complex litigation in a case, the parties may conduct discovery by sending interrogatories (questions) and by requesting the other party to provide documents. These discovery requests usually have a 30 day response period. If these discovery requests are ignored, the requesting party may be able to ask that the court compel the other party to comply and pay fees for non-compliance.
From this overview, one can see that there are numerous deadlines and dates that must be honored in a lawsuit, and an experienced attorney will help meet these deadlines and requirements. If you have any questions, please feel free to call us at 919-787-6668 for guidance or resources.
